A Practical Guide To Increasing Your Magnetism and Presence

Originally published on Cleopatra's Worldwide

"The difference between normal language and seductive language is like the difference between noise and music" – Robert Greene

In 1937, a journalist named Napolean Hill wanted to understand what exactly it takes to become rich. Over the course of 20 years he studied 500 of the world's wealthiest men including Henry Ford and Andrew Carnegie. The results of his research were published in a book optimistically titled Think and Grow Rich.

In this book, Hill highlights the five attributes of what he describes as "sex energy" — something he believes all of history's most successful people have in bucketloads. This presence, otherwise called magnetism, is something you're aware of in certain people, but it's difficult to define.

"There never has been, and never will be a great leader, builder, or artist lacking in this driving force of sex." – Napolean Hill

JFK, Marilyn Monroe, Oprah, Naomi Campbell, Elon Musk. Influential people that have worked on these aspects of themselves, increasing their allure. You could also look at this quality as your seductive ability. Seduction is about bringing people round to your perspective. You gain influence simply because others want to follow you and co-operate; it's a skill of persuasion, essential if you want to be successful in business and in life.

"Seduction is a skill no matter how you use it" – Chen Lizra

"Seduction is a psychological process that transcends gender, except in a few key areas where each gender has its own weakness." – Robert Greene, The Art of Seduction

No. 1: The Handshake

The touch of the hand indicates, instantly, the presence of magnetism, or the lack of it...

Hands are without doubt one of our most powerful tools of communication. When it comes to maximising the impact of your hands in daily life, consider the humble handshake. A firm handshake is often unexpected by someone very feminine but it confirms intent. For that moment when you have someone's hand you can use it to let them know you are engaged and mean business.

No. 2: The Tone of Voice

Magnetism, or sex energy, is the factor with which the voice may be coloured, or made musical and charming...

It's not just what you say, it's the voice you say it in that provides influence and makes people listen to you. Consider Barack Obama. His voice is direct, clear, but with a warmth and softness that makes you trust everything he says. Even when he isn't performing, Obama's voice still cuts through others in the room with greater authority, allowing him to command respect and attention.

No. 3: Posture and Carriage of the Body

Highly sexed people move briskly, and with grace and ease...

Posture, stance, the way you hold yourself; it communicates a lot to people about how you see yourself. Confidence radiates from it. Consider Beyoncé. At just under 5'6, you could be forgiven for thinking she was closer to 6' the way she holds herself. She conveys strength and fearlessness. Two highly seductive qualities in any person.

No. 4: The Vibrations of Thought

Highly sexed people mix the emotion of sex with their thoughts, or may do so at will, and in that way may influence those around them....

Marilyn Monroe cultivated her ability to influence and seduce. Beautiful, yes, but there was a lot more behind her hypnotism than curves and very blonde hair. She oozed sex. It emanated out of her every gesture, her voice, her smell, her eyes. Whilst you don't necessarily want to explicitly drop sex into conversation with your colleagues, subtle ways of bringing the emotions connected to sex — such as hunger or desire — to your presence can have a significant impact on your ability to connect with people.

No. 5: Body Adornment

People who are highly sexed are usually very careful about their personal appearance...

Leaders carefully consider their appearance, even if to decide that understated is their style (Steve Jobs). Your personal appearance communicates a great deal about you, quickly. As a woman who used her magnetism to consolidate an empire, Cleopatra is perhaps the greatest historical example of someone with a carefully considered personal appearance.

"What woman will not follow when an Empress leads the way?" – Juvenal

Master the skills of influence and persuasion and you can use them for whatever you fancy. The use comes down to your character, but know that these are lessons all great leaders have had to unlock, because without the ability to cultivate a following, you aren't really a leader at all.